MY APPROACH
Although there are some happy exceptions, like when I am called for help with an adoption, it is safe to say most of my clients did not want to have to contact a family law attorney. My clients are often dealing with something really tough, immensely personal, incredibly stressful, and are riding a wave of a lot of different emotions – and this is true whether my client is the one initiating the process or the one being pulled into it. When clients first come to me, they are often exhausted, unsettled, intimidated, worried, angry, lost, sad. For some, it is just a matter of having grown apart, becoming roommates more than anything else. People involved in a family law matter often find themselves in the position of having to recognize and absorb complex legal issues, make high-level financial and business decisions, decisions about logistics, and establish new parenting and living arrangements for their children, all within an emotionally-charged and unfamiliar environment. Websites and blogs can be a helpful starting point but can also create confusion and, sometimes, provide misinformation that can complicate rather than help the situation.
When we meet, I will help you sort through what you have heard from others and read online. You may have a lot of questions for me, or you may not even know where to begin, and I will definitely have a lot of questions for you because the information and advice I want to give you is very specific to your circumstances. There are no “standard” provisions or agreements. What worked for a close friend or family member or something posted in a forum may not be what makes most sense for you. So, yes, I will ask you a lot of questions and listen to what you have to say. Together, we will identify your goals and talk about reasonable expectations, and then I will help you understand your options for achieving those goals. We will talk about the pros and cons of those options, I will answer as many questions as you have, giving you some peace and confidence about how the process works, and then we will choose the path of resolution that is right for you and your specific situation.
Much of the time, my clients tell me they are not out for blood, they are not interested in starting a war. They just want me to help determine what is necessary, fair, and reasonable and guide them to a resolution that makes sense. That does not mean clients are not mad or beyond frustrated with the other person, but they also do not want to see themselves or their family drawn into years of litigation and emotional upheaval if it can be avoided. Having practiced family law exclusively for over 20 years, I know there are absolutely circumstances that necessitate filing a lawsuit and heading into court, and I will tell you if your situation requires taking that road. In some cases, the other person has already filed a lawsuit, and we have to engage accordingly. No matter who files first, when we need to go to court, I am ready. I know how to do that. I was trained by the best and have successfully litigated countless trials concerning all kinds of family law matters in courtrooms all across the Triad and beyond. But I have also been doing this long enough to know that court is a destructive process when it is utilized unwisely or unnecessarily. Many family law cases can and should be resolved outside the courtroom, and in those instances, I strive to assist clients in resolving their case through comprehensive settlement measures.
No matter which approach we decide is best, I offer compassion but also objectivity and pragmatism to help you maintain balance and stay focused on the big picture. My role is to stay above the trees, to help you not let emotions get the best of you or push you into decisions that may not be best in the long run, and to help you navigate a path forward.